Many gay and lesbian couples long to have a family, and many of these people share many of the “family values” found in heterosexual families. Loving committed monogamous couples who want to raise their children to know what’s right and wrong, to be polite, respect other people, etc. We do care, and we do have those standards. Just because we’re gay does not mean we are pro promiscuity or don’t care what our children get up to! I think a lot of gay and lesbian couples would agree that they would like their children to have both a male and a female role-model, and in a lot of cases, that can be found in a close family friend, an aunt or an uncle, a grandparent, or even the biological parent.

There continue to be studies on the effects on children in different family circumstances, but I am not going to go into all of that, suffice to say that there is no hard and fast evidence to say that children raised in a same-sex family are any worse off than other children. And when it comes to adoption, I would far rather a child is adopted into a stable loving home consisting of 2 moms or 2 dads, than no parent at all!

The point though, is that the statement outlined in the title is not true. We do care about raising our children to be morally and socially outstanding people, to the best of our ability.

Firstly, how can you stand there and assume and cast judgement on anyone’s parents or upbringing?! Sadly, many gay people have suffered from some of the listed grievances. But, many have not (just ask Shannon K). Let’s not forget that plenty of people (probably more) in the world have suffered those very same grievances, and still remained perfectly straight!

As the for the Christians who might believe that if a person is gay that their parents did not train them in the way they should go.. well trust me.. I was taught very much the way I should go. That couldn’t make me straight, though I have constantly tried! And, I do have a very real relationship with God, and high moral and social standards. Many Christian families raise their children to the best of their ability in the ways of the Lord, and yet many Christian families have gay children. Of course, often not all the children are gay.. siblings raised in the same home and ways of the Lord may be straight, or they may be gay. It’s not up to the parents.

I am not saying that parenting, upbringing, and childhood circumstances and experiences do not have an impact on our lives, but it’s not what makes a person gay or straight. So, parents, stop blaming yourselves! And critics, stop judging us!